Welcome to Thriving Together, your go-to source for timely information, resources and support on the autism journey, sponsored by Metro Parent and Henry Ford Health. 

This month, we’re focusing on DADS! What do fathers of kids with autism need to know about their special role in the life of their child? We’ve gathered what every family needs to know now and in the future to come.

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What are tips for fathering your child with autism?

Historically, mothers have been the primary caregivers, but that's changing. Today, fathers are increasingly involved in raising children with autism, bringing unique benefits to their child's development.

“More dads are involved in their child’s education and therapeutic interventions,” says Dr. Melissa Hendriks, M.D., a child and adolescent psychiatrist at Henry Ford Health’s Center for Autism and Developmental Disabilities (CADD).

Dads have a unique way of parenting

Research shows that dads can be as effective as moms, leading to better outcomes for the whole family when they are involved. Fathers often provide different types of interactions, such as physical play or sports, which can benefit children. "Dads can offer a really good outlet for rougher play or sports, things not necessarily done by moms," notes Sarah Peterson, manager and lead Board Certified Behavior Analyst at CADD.

Collaborative parenting is crucial. Kids learn from both parents, with dads often engaging in more directive and goal-oriented play. This can serve as a foundation for social interaction and skill development. “Fostering curiosity and exploration can be helpful,” says Dr. Hendriks.

When kids have fun, learning happens

Dads can also make learning fun. “If your child is having fun, you can really work on skill-building in many areas, like dressing and cooking,” says Peterson. Fathers are encouraged to participate in ABA therapy parent training to understand and reinforce skills at home.

Finally, teamwork between both parents is essential for success. “We want to take parent goals into consideration when developing the child’s plan,” adds Peterson. Engaging fathers in both daily activities and therapy fosters a supportive environment for the child's growth.

There's more to know! Read more about fathering the child with autism at Metro Parent’s Your Top Kids Health Questions — Answered. 

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What do fathers need to know during every milestone in their child’s life? 

Expertise from Dr. Melissa Hendriks, M.D., child and adolescent psychiatrist, and Sarah Peterson, manager and lead BCBA, both at Henry Ford Health’s Center for Autism and Developmental Disabilities (CADD).

In young children: focus on communication as early as possible — whether this is spoken communication or pictures or using a device. Be sure to involve your child in everyday activities like laundry, cooking, cleaning or washing the car. You may need to adapt for their sensory needs or ability, but having these interactions is important. Don’t be afraid to encourage your child to try something new or more difficult. Take time to give yourself a pat on the back for helping your child get where they are. You can’t compare them to anyone else, but you can compare them to where they were six months ago.

In middle stages: to encourage your tween or teen to build friend groups, start by involving them in activities that have structure and parent involvement. Extracurricular activities, church groups and scouting are great examples. Then, help them find peers with similar interests and develop one-on-one activities to do together. Model the give-and-take that goes along with having friends. Talk about common social situations and how to respond in ways that demonstrate interest and encourage friendship.

In transition to adulthood: now is the time to help your child build job confidence with mock interviews. Share your experience of the adult world! Dads can talk about what it means to show up on time and be a team player. In helping your child prepare for living as independently as possible and intimate relationships, start from an early age by using appropriate anatomical terms for body parts. Have conversations, rather than assuming your kid understands about safe sex. Be aware that kids with autism can be vulnerable to being taken advantage of, so talk about consent and appropriate behavior and respect. If you’re struggling with these topics, involve your intervention team and school. They’ll have resources to help.

…and read more articles that address your top kids health questions!

Resources: organizations, events and more

AutismDadvocate.org

An online forum for a “growing and inspiring segment of Gen X, Gen Y, and Millennials who see being a father as the most important role they will play in their lives.” This site shares personal accounts from dads of children with autism, plus workshops, podcasts and more.

Autism Society of Greater Detroit

Offers peer-to-peer support groups, meet-ups and other resources for parents and families and those with autism.

Sensory Friendly Days at DNR Outdoor Adventure Center

From 10 a.m.- noon on June 8 and July 13, Explore the DNR Outdoor Adventure Center with lower-volume ambient sounds. Quiet room with sensory materials available. June 8 is free fishing weekend, so join in for fishing!

Sensory Friendly Evenings at Detroit Zoo

June 26, July 7 and Aug. 30, 3-7 p.m. Reduced volume and adjusted lighting, plus KultureCity sensory bags to check out.

Bluestone VOICES for Autism

Livonia, Mich. based nonprofit that provides financial and therapeutic support to enhance the lives of children and their families through fundraising events and grantmaking. Funds families of children with autism receiving ABA, speech therapy or occupational therapy in Michigan and individuals pursuing a BCBA degree.

MiABLE

Michigan’s flexible 529 savings account for individuals with disabilities who are eligible for SSI or SSDI.
844-656-7225

Autism Alliance of Michigan

Help, hope and answers, including AAoM’s robust MiNavigator, a state-wide resource for families on all issues related to autism. Visit AAoM for its comprehensive calendar of events.
877-463-AAOM

Autism Support of Kent County

Monthly family events, arts and sports programs, training for law enforcement and first responders, more. Located in Grand Rapids, Mich.

Early On Michigan

Michigan’s system for families with children birth-3 who have developmental delays or developmental disabilities.
800-327-5966

Michigan Autism Program

Resources and support for families and caregivers, including the Michigan ASD State Plan. 

Macomb-Oakland Regional Center (MORC)
Ongoing recreational activities and resources for children and families.

YMCA of Metropolitan Detroit

Aims to accommodate everyone in all Y programs. Reach out to your local YMCA to share any information that will help them better serve your child.

Following your kid’s interests can create a bond you’ll both cherish. Here’s a true story of how it can happen. A son LOVED basketball and everything basketball-related, from stats to video games to shooting hoops in the driveway. His dad? Not so much. But one day, dad decided to take his son to a Pistons game, just for fun. It paid off. They both loved watching pro basketball so much they got season tickets. The dad took a chance, and the son, now an adult, still talks fondly about watching basketball with his dad.

Need More Support?

There's a wealth of knowledge and support available through Henry Ford Health. Learn the latest research regarding autism, discover life-changing outcomes and get expert advice at Henry Ford Health.